


Other Services As Required

by Atalan



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack, Demon Crowley (Good Omens), Fluff, Human Aziraphale (Good Omens), M/M, Oneshot, Prompt Fic, Romance, meet cute, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:54:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28011231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atalan/pseuds/Atalan
Summary: As the saying goes, you don't always get what you want, but sometimes you get what you need.Written for the prompt "Summoning".
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 64
Kudos: 482
Collections: The Not-Very-Nice and Anatomically-Inaccurate Prophecies of OLHTS





	Other Services As Required

**Author's Note:**

> We can have a little bit of soft. As a treat.

“Sorry,” Crowley said, “you want me to _what_?”

The human outside the summoning circle wasn’t at all what he’d been expecting. There had been a certain awkwardness and hesitation in the spell, which had suggested a curious teenager or young adult trying it out for the first time. This man was considerably older than that, though he’d been as surprised by his success as any kid who had ever yanked Crowley into their living room to impress their friends.

He looked, in fact, more like a librarian or professor than anything: dressed in tweed and tartan, with flyaway white-blond hair and laugh lines at the corners of his eyes. Crowley had wondered if he was about to be asked to write a PhD thesis in a night, or something equally dreary. He had thus been completely unprepared for the actual request.

The man blushed, but seemed determined.

“I hope you can help me. I really don’t know where else to turn.”

Crowley was off-balance enough that he almost told the man that he didn’t have to _hope_ , that with Crowley in the circle he could simply issue commands. He caught himself at the last minute. Never a good idea to tell someone they had more power over you than they thought they did.

“I mean,” Crowley said after a moment, “it’s hardly the first time someone’s summoned a demon to get laid, but that was back before internet porn and Craigslist prostitutes–”

“It’s not about ‘ _getting laid’_ ,” the human retorted, blushing even harder. “Well. I mean. It _is_ , but…” 

He fretted with his hands, staring down at his perfect fingernails. Crowley wondered if he kept them like that himself, or if he was a regular at the nail salon.

“Oh, it’s silly, isn’t it?” the man said with a sigh. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have troubled you–”

“What’s your name?” Crowley asked before he could stop himself.

“Aziraphale,” the human replied, with an embarrassed sort of half-smile. “Bit of a mouthful, I know.”

“Aziraphale,” Crowley repeated. “You want to tell me what brought this on? ‘Cos you don’t seem like the type. No offence.”

“What _type_?”

“The type to let all that bullshit about virginity get to you,” Crowley said pointedly. “That’s what this is about, right? Feeling like you _ought_ to have done it by now.”

Aziraphale sputtered for a moment, but Crowley knew from his chagrined expression that he was close to the mark.

“It’s just…” Aziraphale bit his lip. “My brother, you see…”

“Ah. Big jock type? All about being a _man_ and doing… I dunno… _man things?_ ”

Aziraphale sighed mightily.

“Oh, you have noidea,” he said. “It’s not just him, though, my sisters– oh, but where are my manners? Do come and sit down. You don’t have to stay in that circle.”

Crowley sucked in his breath silently. Stupid, stupid man, to give him that kind of freedom without caveat, to let him loose without bargains or commands… if Crowley had been any other demon…

He sauntered out of the circle. There was nowhere to sit but the bed, made up with old-fashioned sheets and blankets. They ended up awkwardly side by side, backs against the headboard.

“Right,” Crowley said. “So what’s up with your family, then?”

The answer was so long, convoluted, and packed with petty human unkindness, that Aziraphale was still talking over two hours later, and Crowley had gone from disinterested witness to _thoroughly invested_ on Aziraphale’s behalf.

“He really said that? At Michael’s _wedding_?”

“Yes! And he has never, ever apologised! Sometimes he brings it up like it’s a funny anecdote!”

“What a wanker,” Crowley muttered. “What an absolute _tit_.”

The other thing he’d learned over the last couple of hours was that Aziraphale had a dazzling smile when he was caught off guard, and particularly when it was laced with delighted scandal at the things Crowley said about his family. Crowley had started trying to make it happen on purpose. This was a good one, wide-eyed as if about to scold him for language, lips curving helplessly even so.

“He… he _is_ , isn’t he?” Aziraphale half-whispered, as if afraid to be overheard. Crowley laughed, slouching down more comfortably against the pillows. “Do you know, I don’t think I’ve ever… I don’t think I’ve ever really _talked_ about him like this. I don’t think I’ve ever realised just how… just how _awful_ he is.”

He looked almost ashamed of himself.

“You get used to things,” Crowley offered gently. “It seems normal if you don’t have any point of comparison.”

Aziraphale nodded slowly.

“And look,” Crowley went on, leaning over on his elbow to make his point, “all that stuff he’s said to you? About _growing up_ and _taking responsibility_ and _settling down_? It’s bullshit. Take it from me – I’ve seen a lot of humans live a lot of different ways. Do what works for you. And for the love of– Someone– don’t shag a demon just to tick off a box on his list!”

Aziraphale blushed again, but he was smiling through it, his eyes gone rather soft as they studied Crowley’s face.

“Thank you,” he said quietly. “You’re– you’ve been very kind.”

Crowley grimaced.

“Don’t say that. Do you know how much trouble I could get in?”

“For what?” Aziraphale asked. “Being a good person?”

“Yes!” Crowley scowled as menacingly as he could manage, which wasn’t very menacing at all, given that he was lounging on a tartan bedspread. “Demons are _not_ good people.”

Aziraphale studied him for a few long moments. Something in his face caught oddly at a point deep in Crowley’s chest.

“I think I would venture to disagree.” 

And then, before Crowley could protest further, Aziraphale leaned over and pressed a soft, hopeful kiss to his mouth.

“Wh–” Crowley stared at him, feeling his own cheeks heat. “What did I just say about–”

“What if it’s not to tick any boxes?” 

Aziraphale had wriggled closer somehow, was close enough to lay a hand on Crowley’s chest, to run his thumb hesitantly over the buttons of Crowley’s shirt. His cheeks were pink and his eyes were very blue and the thing in Crowley’s chest tugged harder, like the gravity kicking in for a newly-formed star.

“I–”

Uncertainty crept into Aziraphale’s expression. His hand stilled, then withdrew.

“Of course, you don’t have to– I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking–”

Crowley stopped him with another kiss, longer and deeper. Aziraphale was soft under his hands when he pulled him in closer, and the little noise he made sent a bolt of pure electricity down Crowley’s spine.

“There’s one thing you should know, though,” Crowley said reluctantly when they parted for air. Aziraphale’s fingers were on his shirt buttons again, and the light touch was making his skin tingle even through the fabric. “I’m not– the thing is I haven’t really– look, I dunno what summoning spell you used, but if it was supposed to bring you someone with _experience_ , it, uh… didn’t.”

“Oh,” Aziraphale breathed. He didn’t seem disappointed. If anything, the way he was looking at Crowley intensified into something golden and as warm as a summer day. “It, ah– it was actually a conditional summoning. It was supposed to bring me… the right demon for what I needed.”

Aziraphale kissed him again. Crowley was surprised to find his eyes fluttering shut of their own accord, his breath caught in a little hitch that couldn’t escape past Aziraphale’s lips. Aziraphale drew back, and brought up his hand to stroke wonderingly over Crowley’s cheek.

“In fact, I think it worked perfectly,” Aziraphale said.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] Other Services As Required](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28014921) by [Djapchan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Djapchan/pseuds/Djapchan)




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